


Call it unsinkable, though it is sinkable.

by serendipitouspeach



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alex is the big sister nobody asked for but everybody wants, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Kara and Lena are soft idiots, Lena Luthor Needs a Hug, Soft Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, heart scrunchies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-06-02
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:28:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24501628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serendipitouspeach/pseuds/serendipitouspeach
Summary: “Because I like her, okay?” Lena blurted, before her mind could catch up with her. “I like her.” She said again, softly.orLena realizes her feelings are a little more than friendly, so she makes the obvious decision to avoid Kara at all costs because that's what you do when you're in love, right?
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 7
Kudos: 630





	Call it unsinkable, though it is sinkable.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I've written in a while, and it's also the first day of Pride. While I'm not yet in a spot where I feel comfortable shouting it from the rooftops (or social media) this is the most comfortable I've been with my own identity over the past two and a half years.
> 
> The world is hurting right now, in more ways than one. I don't have all the words to explain how I feel, but a friend encouraged me to lean into love, so that's what I'm doing. This fic has a lot of me woven into it, so I'm letting it serve as my own mini Pride celebration and using it as a form of catharsis to articulate the thoughts I can't yet voice.
> 
> Stay safe, look out for one another, and stay well <3
> 
> (Title from "On This the 100th Anniversary of the Sinking of the Titanic, We Reconsider the Buoyancy of the Human Heart" by Laura Lamb Brown-Lavoie)

Lena hardly saw her apartment before 7 PM on a normal workday, so it was a rarity that she was home before nightfall on an evening when she  ~~ claimed to be ~~ was busier than ever.

She’d left her office just after five, reassuring a concerned Jess that  _ yes, she was fine, no she wasn’t ill. See this stack of folders? That means work. Work she will be doing. From her apartment. If Lena were sick, would she be working? Nevermind, don’t answer that. _

She’d chosen to ignore Jess’ eye roll and bid her goodbye until the next morning, stepping into the elevator down to the parking garage where her car was waiting to take her home.

_ Leaving  _ ~~_ on time _ ~~ _ early had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that she wanted to avoid seeing any certain faces should they show up at her office unannounced. Not one bit. _

* * *

Lena had been home for a couple of hours, relishing in the peaceful quiet of her apartment. Soft music floated throughout the space as she puttered around, gathering ingredients to start dinner. She gave herself a  ~~ very real because no one was there to see it and make fun of her ~~ pat on the back for remembering to place a grocery order the day before so that she would have fresh ingredients at her disposal. 

As her oven heated up, she chopped the vegetables she planned to roast, humming softly along to the music in the background. The stack of folders she’d brought home from work sat forgotten on her end table, her heels from the workday strewn somewhere in the hallway near the front door. 

As she slid the tray of vegetables into the oven and set the timer, her thoughts flickered to a certain blonde reporter.

* * *

_ A few months back, Kara had invited Lena over for a movie night. When Lena arrived at the loft and knocked softly on the door, Kara yelled a frantic “It’s open!” and Lena swiftly entered, concerned at the tone of her voice. _

_ She walked into a kitchen filled with smoke and a haggard looking Kara, holding a tray full of what looked like burnt asparagus.  _

_ “Kara, what happened?” _

_ “I got distracted and forgot to take the tray out of the oven.” She said, sheepishly. “It uh, got a little burnt.” _

_ Lena snorted, “I think ‘a little’ is being generous.” She eyed the tray, suspiciously, “You don’t cook, why the sudden change?” _

_ Kara’s cheeks flushed as she looked down at the tray, picking at a piece of charred asparagus. _

_ “We always have my favorite, so I wanted to surprise you with yours.” She shrugged, looking up.  _

_ Lena blinked at the admission and felt a warmth in her chest that was becoming more and more familiar.  _

_ “Oh. Well- you didn’t have to do that. I know how much you dislike anything green.” Lena scrunched her eyebrows, nodding toward the tray.  _

_ “I wanted to, you deserve to have your favorite too.” _

_ Lena felt her own cheeks heat up at that so she turned, setting her coat and purse on the bench next to the door. _

_ “How about I help? We can make them together and I can show you how to tell when they’re perfectly done. I’ll even let you order potstickers to go with them, since I wager you won’t stomach more than a bite or two of asparagus.” _

_ “I already ordered some.” Kara mumbled under her breath. Lena let out a laugh and Kara’s eyes lit up at the clear, unburdened sound.  _

_ “Of course you did, darling.” Lena said, picking up the tray and scraping the burnt veggies into the trash. _

_ She moved through the kitchen, gathering supplies as Kara leaned against the island, content in watching Lena work.  _

_ “I’m surprised you didn’t get kale,” Lena said with a smirk. _

_ Kara shivered, “I love you, and you love kale, but I will not let that sorry excuse for food in my apartment.” _

_ Lena froze at Kara’s words, as if all the breath had left her lungs. She stood there for a moment, soaking it in, though she was sure it meant nothing. She shook her head and sent a smile Kara’s way.  _

_ “Well, it’s a good thing asparagus is my second favorite. Come here, I’ll show you how to cook it properly.” _

* * *

The whole thing was painfully domestic and Lena had to remind herself many times over the course of the night that it meant nothing. Kara was just being a thoughtful friend and Lena needed to stop  ~~ projecting her own feelings onto the reporter ~~ overthinking it.

She shook her head trying to clear her thoughts, before placing a pot of water on the stove to boil. Padding across the kitchen toward her wine rack (more modest than many would think) she selected a bottle and pulled a glass from the cupboard above.

Just as she’d topped off her glass, a knock echoed through the apartment, interrupting the quiet calm that had finally settled. She glanced at the clock, wondering who would have cause to visit her place at this hour when her stomach dropped.

She rounded the island, depositing her glass on the counter, making her way toward the door. Breathing in as deep as she could to calm her racing heart,  she ~~hoped it was the blonde reporter~~ prayed it was the older Danvers.

* * *

Alex looked up as the door swung open, revealing an impossibly soft, younger looking Lena Luthor, clad in a henley and pajama pants. 

“Hello, Alex.” Lena spoke curtly, clearly trying to school her expression. Alex could feel the nerves rolling off her in waves, so she softened her demeanor. 

“Hey, Lena. Can I come in?”

Lena nodded, stepping back to let the agent through, before shutting the door behind her. 

Alex gazed around the apartment, noting the wine glass and the stack of folders. She looked over at Lena, who was hovering by the island.

“It smells wonderful in here.” Alex said, offering a small smile. 

Lena returned it with a tight smile of her own. “Thanks.”

Silence fell between the two women. Alex glanced around the apartment again, hands shoved into her pockets, before Lena spoke up.

“Is there something I can help you with?”

Alex’s expression softened again as she looked over at the CEO. Lena looked nothing like the billionaire dressed in power suits and stilettos that graced the halls of LCorp during the day. She looked more human; smaller, softer, every bit of the young woman who’d had to grow up too soon.

Alex leaned against the island, tilting her head as she spoke. “I’m here to check on you. You haven’t been to game night in a couple weeks and Kara’s had trouble getting in touch with you.”

Lena looked down and reached for her glass,  ~~ avoiding Alex’s gaze ~~ focusing on the drink she’d poured for herself.

“I’ve been busy trying to catch up on work. Game and movie nights were cutting into my late hours at the office and I’ve fallen behind on paperwork.”

Alex nodded, glancing over at the stack of folders on the end table that had clearly been dismissed.

“Looks like you’re getting a lot of paperwork done here.” Lena glanced up, following Alex’s nod toward the folders. Her cheeks flushed as she set her wine glass back down, not having yet taken a sip. 

“Am I not entitled to a break for meals?” Lena countered, though her voice wavered.

Alex narrowed her eyes, “You don’t seem to ever break for food at work unless Kara stops by and forces you to.”

Lena flinched at the mention of Kara’s name before hardening her expression and gesturing around her. “I’m not at work now, am I?”

Alex scoffed, sitting down on the stool closest to the end of the counter. 

“No, you’re not, which is strange and also why I’m here.” Lena lifted a brow in response, stomach rolling with the thought of what was coming next.

“You’re never here at your apartment this early. You rarely leave work before nine on a good day, let alone during a week when you claim you’ve been swamped with paperwork.”

Alex leaned forward on the counter, trying to catch Lena’s gaze. “Kara knows you’ve been avoiding her, Lena.”

She turned away from the agent, busying herself with folding the two kitchen towels on the counter near the sink. 

“I haven’t been avoiding her.” Lena mumbled quietly, though she knew her efforts were useless.

She could practically feel Alex rolling her eyes as she snorted behind her, “Yeah, and I’m not gay.”

Lena’s lips quirked up at that but she didn’t dare let the other woman see. 

“She cares about you, you know. Like a lot. And she’s hurting right now, knowing you’re avoiding her.”

Lena turned slightly, glancing toward her. “Kara’s got lots of friends, I’m sure game night is just as good or even better, without me.”

Alex pinned her with a look, shaking her head. “First of all, that’s not true. Second of all, she misses  _ you _ , Lena. Not her other friends. She said she hasn’t been able to get a hold of you for over a week. Every time she’s stopped by LCorp, Jess has told her you’re in the lab or in a meeting.”

Lena felt a wave of guilt wash over her and she pushed her wine glass further away, suddenly not so interested in it. She squeezed her eyes shut and leaned against the counter.

“You claim you’re busy with work, and yet, here you are in your apartment with no work in sight! Lena-,” Alex leaned forward, resting her hand on top of hers, “Kara cares about you, more than anyone I know. Why are you shutting her out?”

“Because I like her, okay?” Lena blurted, before her mind could catch up with her. She opened her eyes and pulled her hand out from underneath Alex’s, crossing her arms. 

“I like her.” She said again, softly.

Lena stood there for a moment, considering her own admission. Alex sat quietly, watching as she turned away from the counter and moved toward the stove which now held a pot of boiling water. She opened a package of pasta and added it to the water before pulling open the oven door and checking on the vegetables inside.

Satisfied with how everything looked, she closed the oven and moved to pull two plates down from a cupboard nearby. 

Alex’s confusion must have shown on her face when Lena glanced back at her so she set the plates down on the counter and shrugged.

“I figured you’re not going to let my admission go without a full interrogation, so you might as well stay for dinner.”

* * *

The two women sat in a weighted silence, the echo of their silverware against their plates filling the room. 

“Am I the only person you’ve told?” 

Lena glanced up as Alex spoke, the older woman looking a mixture of curious and hesitant.

She avoided Alex’s gaze and shrugged, “I was planning on keeping it to myself until it went away, though I suppose that’s all for naught now.”

Lena speared a piece of broccoli with her fork, not noticing how the agent’s eyebrows drew together in confusion. 

“Until it went away? What are you talking about, Lena?”

Lena set her fork down, accepting that they were having this conversation now. She folded her arms over her stomach and leaned back, slightly.

“I  _ am _ busy, Alex. I do have paperwork to catch up on and hours to make up for in the lab. But I also need some time away from Kara to get over my feelings.”

Alex’s brow furrowed further, if possible. Lena picked up her fork and pushed the remainder of her food around on her plate, suddenly not very hungry anymore.

“I know she doesn’t feel the same and-” Lena’s voice grew quieter, “and I don’t want to put her in an uncomfortable position should my unfortunate circumstance come to light.”

She set her fork down and repositioned her arms against her stomach, trying to prevent any painful words that Alex might throw her way from hitting too close to home.

But when she looked up, she found that the older Danvers had that soft, concerned look that was seemingly reserved for her sister and her sister only. Lena felt her ears burn red.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

Alex tilted her head, brows still furrowed, “Because I care about you, Lena, and this isn’t healthy.”

Lena shook her head and grabbed her napkin from the table, folding it over once and again and then again, until she noticed the trembling in her hands. She stood up, taking her plate from the table and gripping her napkin in her other hand.

“I really think you should talk to her-”

“No!” Lena’s voice came out louder than she expected and her plate landed on the counter with a sharp clatter.

“Lena-,” Alex started again but stopped when Lena looked over, her eyes pleading.

“Didn’t you hear me before, Alex? This is mortifying as it is and I don’t want to risk losing my best friend because of some silly unrequited feelings.”

Alex stood from the table and carried her own plate to the counter, leaning against the island. 

“They’re not silly, Lena.”

The younger woman ran a hand through her hair, wincing when it got tangled in a knot near the end.

“Look, Kara’s got a lot on her plate and the last thing she needs is a clingy Luthor who caught feelings. She doesn’t deserve that.”

Lena scooped up both plates and began to clean up the remnants of their dinner. She quietly moved around the kitchen, feeling Alex’s stare hot on the back of her neck, but didn’t say anything. 

“Ok, then, what about how Kara feels, hm? You don’t think she deserves to be around a quote ‘Clingy Luthor’ but doesn’t she at least deserve the chance to form her own opinion?”

Lena turned the faucet off, opening her mouth to respond but Alex continued.

“You’re taking that choice away from her, Lena, and that’s not fair.” Alex stood up straight and took a step toward her.

“The Lena I know,” Alex tapped a finger to her chest, “is fair and honest and I think we  _ both _ know that Kara would be more than upset if she found out that you were holing yourself up in your apartment to repress your emotions because you thought you couldn’t-  _ shouldn’t _ talk to her about this.” 

Alex crossed her arms and shifted her weight, that same concerned big-sister look clouding her face once again.

Lena bit her lip and drew her eyebrows together, dissecting Alex’s words. She  ~~ knew she was right ~~ tried to think of any argument that could sway the woman away from trying to convince her to talk to Kara. 

Her eyes stung with the familiar burn of tears as she contemplated what to do next. Would Kara even want to talk to her? She may not be the best at avoiding people  _ (example A standing two feet away from her) _ but she had clearly hurt Kara’s feelings in her attempts to stay away.

She looked up at Alex, blinking away the tears that were welling. She could feel her cheeks heating up again, no longer from embarrassment but from uncertainty instead.

She lifted her shoulders in a half-shrug, feeling her insecurities flood through her chest.

“I wouldn’t even know where to start.” 

Alex gave her a small smile, reaching forward to pull her into her side and squeezing her tight.

“C’mon. Grab your stuff and I’ll drive you. We’ll make a pit stop for ice cream on the way. She’ll never say no to you  _ and _ food.”

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Lena found herself standing in front of Kara’s door once again. This time it was later, almost nine, and there was no lingering scent of burnt asparagus in the air. 

She rocked back on her heels and took a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves. She could definitely  ~~ not ~~ do this. She could knock on the door, not get swallowed by her own shame, and have a calm conversation without absolutely panicking and feeling out of her own mortification.

_ Easy enough. _

She knocked once, firmly, before the door swung open revealing her friend. Kara looked almost as nervous as Lena felt, her lip drawn between her teeth and her hands tucked into her sweater sleeves.

But there was something else- an underlying sadness that graced her features. Kara’s eyes looked tired, something that Lena hadn’t ever really noticed, and it made her chest ache knowing that her avoidance likely had something to do with it.

“Hi,” Lena said, letting out a breath. “Can we talk? I brought ice cream.”

Kara’s eyes softened as she glanced down at the bag Lena was holding. She met her gaze and nodded, stepping back to let her in.

Kara took the bag and grabbed two spoons from the drawer as Lena slipped off her shoes and draped her coat over the hook by the door.

Kara caught her eye as she turned around and nodded toward the couch, “Let’s sit?”

It was a peace offering, as if Kara felt she needed to be the one to extend the olive branch. Lena’s guilt settled deeper in her stomach.

She accepted the container of ice cream from Kara as they sat, pulling a pillow into her lap and drawing her knees up close.

It was quiet for a moment and Lena watched Kara pick at her ice cream before she spoke.

“I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you, it- it wasn’t my intention to hurt you.” Lena looked down at her hands. They were turning slightly pink from the cold of the ice cream carton.

“Did I do something wrong?” Lena looked up, quickly shaking her head, “No, no not at all. You didn’t do anything, it’s all me.”

Kara’s brow furrowed and Lena felt her heart clench at the sight of the familiar crinkle just above her glasses.

“It’s just- it’s embarrassing and I’m really nervous that I’m going to ruin things even though it feels like I might’ve already done that.” 

Lena glanced up again and Kara shook her head, speaking softly. “You haven’t ruined anything, Lena.”

“Okay, well- I just, I don’t know how to-,” 

“Lena,” Kara breathed, as she reached forward, taking the carton out of her hands and setting them both on the table. She grasped Lena’s hands in her own, offering an encouraging smile. “You can tell me anything, you know that.”

Lena nodded and let out a shaky breath.  ~~ Might as well savor the few moments of comfort in this friendship that she had left ~~ Here goes nothing.

“I like you. A lot. And I’ve been trying to figure out how to deal with that. I didn’t want to impose on you or make you uncomfortable because my stupid crush shouldn’t have to be your inconvenience so,” Lena swallowed, her voice feeling thick in her throat. “I tried to seclude myself as much as possible to give myself time to get over you so I wouldn’t burden you with my silly unrequited feelings.”

Her eyes began to sting again and she cursed herself for being too emotional but kept talking anyway. “But then Alex found me at my apartment and told me I was being unfair and that you should be allowed to make that choice for yourself.”

Kara gently squeezed her hand and she looked up, hoping that she hadn’t just ruined ~~the~~ ~~ best thing that had ever happened to her ~~ everything.

“I think Alex was right,” Kara spoke softly, running her thumb across Lena’s hand. The younger woman sniffled and reached up to wipe at her eyes. “I do want to make that choice for myself.”

“I wish you would’ve talked to me sooner, I’ve really missed you the past couple of weeks.” Kara admitted with a small smile. 

“Game night wasn’t the same without you and Alex kept poking fun at me for moping. She said that I looked like Eeyore when he lost his tail.” 

Lena’s head tilted in confusion-  _ where was she going with this? _

“I went to LCorp a few times, I’m sure Jess told you, but I could never get a hold of you. You weren’t answering my texts or calls, so I just assumed you didn’t want to see me. I thought I’d upset you.”

Kara lifted her hand to adjust her glasses, “Alex called me out on it again and told me to go see you at your apartment once and for all to sort out my feelings, but I was too scared. I guess that’s when she went instead.” 

Kara looked up and met Lena’s eyes, a mixture of hope and something else, love? Swimming in her gaze.

She took a deep breath, taking both of Lena’s hands in her own and squaring her shoulders. 

“What I’m trying to say is that your feelings aren’t unrequited. They’re not silly and my opinion, that I’ve had the opportunity to form on my own, is that I like you too. A lot. And I’d really like to give this-,” She gestured between the two of them, “A try, if that’s alright with you.”

Lena sat there for a moment, reminding herself to breathe.

“Aren’t you scared?” Lena asked, her voice small and laced with trepidation.

“All the time,” Kara admitted, offering a half smile, “But I also have hope. Quite a bit of it, in fact.”

Lena let out a watery laugh and Kara reached up, stroking her thumb across her cheek.

“Things will always sink if you never give them the chance to swim. I know that this is scary and uncertain, but we’ll never know if we don’t try.”

Lena nodded, sniffling again, shifting closer to Kara. She leaned into the reporter’s shoulder, grasping her hand tightly in her own. 

“Promise me you’ll be there by my side, no matter what?” Lena’s voice was quiet.

“Promise me you’ll be by mine?” Kara countered, looking down to meet Lena’s eyes.

Her gaze softened and her cheeks grew the slightest bit rosy as she nodded. 

“Always.”


End file.
